“Is it solipsistic in here, or is it just me?”
What do you call two crows on a branch? Attempted murder.
An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German are walking down the street together. A juggler is performing on the street but there are so many people that the four men can’t see the juggler. So the juggler goes on top of a platform and asks: “Can you see me now?” The four men answer: “Yes.” “Oui.” “Si.” “Ja.”
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? None, it’s a hardware problem.
A Roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers, and says: “Five beers, please.”
A programmer’s wife tells him: “Run to the store and pick up a loaf of bread. If they have eggs, get a dozen.” The programmer comes home with 12 loaves of bread.