Probably seen some of these before
Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.
Ignoranus : A person who's both stupid and an #!%$^!.
Intaxicaton : Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.
Foreploy : Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
Sarchasm : The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
Abdicate, v. To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
Esplanade, v. To attempt an explanation while drunk.
Willy-nilly, adj. Impotent.
Negligent, adj. Absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a nightgown.
Balderdash, n. A rapidly receding hairline.
Frisbeetarianism, n. The belief that, after death, the soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
Circumvent, n. An opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men